This is Missy.
Can I help you?
If you call the Middle School where I work, that is what you
are likely to hear when I answer the phone.
The parents that call throughout the day are kind and gracious,
apologizing for interrupting my work. But
it’s what I do. It’s what I want to
do. To help them, and to help
others. It’s not altruism if you get
something out of it, is it?
I’m pursing a Masters in School Counseling, also a helping
profession. It’s what I enjoy, it’s what
I do.
What I find most challenging is helping myself. The faculty at Western Carolina, and the profession as
a whole, emphasize time and again the importance of self-care. Just as you’re instructed to do on a plane,
with a small child, in the event there is a loss of oxygen. Help yourself first, so you can help the one
in need beside you.
I recently finished a class on addiction and one of our
assignments was to abstain from one thing, while simultaneously embracing another,
the other being something good for us.
After considerable deliberation, I gave up texting. I will spare you the details, but suffice it to
say I found it difficult to refrain and relapsed on more than one occasion.
What surprised me was how much harder it was to make time
for meditation, my enriching activity. There
was time, but what I truly lacked was commitment. Housework, homework, my children, and their
homework all took precedence over that portion of the assignment. It was easy to disregard because making time
for that, meant making time for me, and well, if I’m taking care of myself, I’m
not taking care of anyone else.
Oxygen, anyone? I get
it. And you know who else does? My new favorite heroine, Brené Brown. She’s a professor of Social Work at the
University of Houston who has made significant strides in what we know
about shame, vulnerability, and wholehearted living through her research. She posted a play list on her
blog today, and it’s inspiring me.
What will I find this summer to be my oxygen, to fill my lungs and
thereby my soul? Running, hiking, reading,
meditating, and most importantly being with my children. These will fill my heart and soul.
What will you do?
PS – I must give my friend and colleague, John Douglas, Assistant Principal at
Carolina Day Middle School, credit for introducing me to Brown’s work. I think I will be forever grateful.
